This morning, I had to diffuse another tiny spat between our son, Kaelin (8), and daughter, Laila (5). I have told him repeatedly not to go back and forth with her when she's not listening to him. I appreciate his fervor for wanting her to do the right things, but I also want him to remember that he is her brother, not her dad. His role is to help; our role is to enforce. Plus, they're LOUD in the morning and some people are still trying to sleep! LOLBefore he goes to school, I RE-remind him that if he has to tell his sister something more than 3 times either tell a parent or let it go - unless she is in danger.
He goes into, "Well, she kept talking..." and "...she doesn't listen..." and "...she makes me angry, and..."
I listen. I let him get it all out.
And now it's our turn (the Spirit and I) - A mother to her son:
I told you not to do something and you continue to do it. You're being disobedient and it's not cool. I understand how that would make you angry - it would make me angry - but that does not make it ok for you to disobey your parents.
You need to take responsibility for your actions. You can't go through life blaming other people for what you do. Even if it seems justifiable. And that applies to me, too!
God is my Dad - He is our Father. He tells me that people will know I am His disciple by the love that I show. So if a random person slaps me in the face three times for no reason, that would make me angry and my first reaction would be to hit them back. But my Dad tells me to "turn the other cheek." Now I have a choice. Either I hit that person like I want to or I can be obedient and do what my Dad told me. I'm going to choose obedience and restrain myself - and walk or run away if I feel that I can't restrain myself. What also helps is that I know my Dad will take care of that random person for messing with me! His word says not to touch his anointed and woe unto him who causes His children to stumble. My Dad will take care of that person much better than I think I can - that's the truth.
So, just like I have to be obedient to my authority, you have to do the same thing. And this applies to your entire life. You practice and perfect it in here so when you leave the house it's automatic.
If your sister gets in trouble, that's on her. You're doing a great job trying to help her, but you can't make her do anything. And you can trust that if she needs to be disciplined, your dad & I are on it. But she'll learn, just like you. *wink*
After that, I asked him if he understood what I was saying. I don't want to just talk at him, I really want to explain things in a way where he truly understands how my words apply directly to him. He said yes, but what makes me smile inside is that I can see the "yes" on his face - that is a genuine sign that it clicked. And God is so great that even in an opportunity to guide my son physically and spiritually, He also ministers to me about my obedience and walking out His word.
Lord, thank you for your Spirit that allows us glorify you in all situations. I thank you that you did provide a manual for raising our children, the bible, your word. Please help us to be obedient to all of your commands. We do not want to be found compromising in any way. We love you with all our heart, our soul, our mind and strength. To you be glory, now and forever - Amen.
Scriptures referenced:
Matthew 5:39
Psalm 105:15
Luke 17:1